Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Tummy Whenever:: 38 Weeks

It's late and I am up, blogging.  Something has to be wrong with me, right?  I am counting down the days until I deliver my sweet baby girl.  All I can do is crochet, blog, take pictures, and other creative things.  What I should be doing is cleaning my apartment and double checking to make sure I have everything sorted for when I have to go into hibernation for a few weeks.  Isn't it funny how people cope with things?  I prefer to be creative when I feel stressed, rather than work on the things that may be causing me the stress. 

Speaking of stress......  Trying to take family pictures?!  STRESSSSS!
Let me just walk you through my disaster...

First, The Hubs hates pictures, like most men, I suppose.  He hates the idea of getting dressed up, and smiling, and posing, and taking the time to make sure each photo is of decent quality.  I will be honest, he was very patient with me about the whole ordeal.  Most of the stress was my own fault.

During this pregnancy, whenever I have a busy day filled with something I am not entirely 100% excited about doing, I sabotage myself by staying awake almost all night.  It is such a Horrible Habit that I have formed, but I can't stop myself!  I am anxious and stressed, which just leads to a bit of insomnia.  The night before these photos, I went to bed around 6am.  I woke up three hours later than planned.

Rather than getting the ball rolling, I decided I needed to have sex..... for, like, 2 more hours.  I have NO IDEA what is wrong with me, but I have been very needy in that department lately.  I would also like to formally announce that semen has done NOTHING in terms of inducing labor.  I am beginning to think that whole thing is a complete myth.  Either that, or maybe I need to drink it or shoot it directly into my blood stream?  Who knows, but I know I am not in labor!
After that, I ate, watched TV, lied in bed scrolling through social media........ Next thing I know, OH SHIT!  It's 3pm.  I was supposed to be OUT in the sun, taking the pictures at 3pm!  Well, I had to do something with my hair, so I flat ironed it, which took forever.  We were ready to go at 5:30pm.  Epic. Fucking. Fail.

Additionally, right before leaving, I found out the area I wanted to take pictures had flooded from all the melted snow.  That wouldn't have been a problem *IF* a man were not involved.  Me, I am thinking:  Oh My!  A flood!  Let's immediately change to Option B.

The Hubs thinks:  There's a flood!  Blah, blah, blah-- something about why didn't you plan better, woman-- blah, blah, blah.  Well, let's detour for an hour and a half to see if we can find that spot you wanted.

An hour and a half later, we discovered what I already knew.  The area was under water.  Lots of dirty water.  It was completely impossible.  By now, it's almost 7pm.  We are hungry.  I am a ball of stress and fits.  The Hubs was amazing, as he continued to drive around in circles. Finally, I decide I want sushi (cue all the criticisms about eating raw fish, mercury, and soft cheeses....  I have my middle finger ready.) I decide that taking pictures was a bad idea and I'm too hungry to care anymore.

Thankfully, our sushi spot is next to a park.  Unfortunately, the pretty, woodsy area I needed was a long, LONG way for me to waddle with my cankles.  So I walked as far as I could, peacefully ignoring my husband's horrible suggestions for spots to take pictures.  Spots like in front of soccer goals with soccer players running in the background.  Spots like an empty swimming pool filled with dirt and leaves.  Spots like a random tree with the parking lot in the background.  LOLOL!!  I love this man to the moon, but he doesn't have a single shred of artistic vision.  Not a drop.

Finally, we found a spot.  It was across a moat filled with bugs and deer shit.  I am not sure how much of which of those I stepped in with my bare feet, but I am just going to say it was worth it in the end.  I am reasonably happy with the way the photos came out. Taking the photos was practically mission impossible.  Between our Little Darling complaining about being covered in bugs and mud and trying to get her to resist the natural childlike urge to want to take off running around in an open field, I thought I was going to scream.  Between The Hubs making crazy faces in each photo and then grabbing my butt as the timer ended over and over, which resulted in my making weird faces, I thought I was going to lose my mind!

I am grateful that we made the time to take them since we never did it with our Little Darling.  I want to capture these moments, as The Hubs and I agree that we don't want to create more children.  In the future, adoption is on the table, but neither of us enjoys my being pregnant and we agree that we don't want to experience it again.  But The Hubs and our Little Darling have been complaining about wanting to be a part of my blog and pregnancy journal.  I think they now understand why I haven't made it a weekly habit of dressing them and dragging them around to take pictures for the past 9 months.  I will, however, in these last few moments, include them as much as possible.  It means everything to me to document this time. Since each moment of this experience very well may be our last, I want this to be a beautiful stain in all our memories.

 

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